Baby I Want You Back: Re-Engaging Users Who Have Abandoned Your Product
Baby I Want You Back: Re-Engaging Users Who Have Abandoned Your Product
Why RomComs' structure is useful for understanding marketing
Sometimes marketing feels like dating—You put yourself out there to try to attract someone.
For dating, it’s the feeling in your gut before asking someone out.
For marketing, it’s the feeling in your gut before sending out a campaign.1
And sometimes you get through a few dates—or a few engagement points—and it just doesn’t pan out.
Should that be the end of the road?
NO!
If there’s anything I’ve learned from 2000s RomComs, its that you can win someone back by reaching out one last time2.
Don’t Think One Try Is All You Get
Losing a lead or having a user abandon your product can feel like a missed connection, but it’s not necessarily the end of the road.
Effective outreach can bring these users back and turn them into loyal customers.
The key is to approach retargeting thoughtfully—focusing on those with the highest lifetime value (LTV) potential, and being intentional with your outreach practices rather than spamming everyone who’s showed interest.
In this post, I’ll show you how re-engaging lost leads is like a RomCom
The Break Up: Understand Why Users Left
Was it them?
Was it me?
Before planning your Big Gesture (retargeting strategies), it's important to understand why users abandoned your product.
If someone left you for a good reason, it’s important to fix that before reaching out again.
Common reasons might include a poor user experience, pricing concerns, or simply getting distracted.
Use feedback tools, surveys, interviews(!), or analytics to pinpoint the issue.
Also Know What You Can’t Win: Prioritize High LTV Leads
Not every lead is worth pursuing.
Instead of casting too wide a net, focus on users who have shown the highest potential for high LifeTime Value (LTV).
This includes those who spent significant time on your site, added items to their cart, or have a history of purchasing similar products.
Retargeting these high-value users increases the likelihood of converting them and justifies the investment.
Don’t fall for hype—think to first principles!
The Grand Gesture: Plan How To Reach Out
If you’ve decided that reaching out is worth it, think about how you’ll do it.
What are you going to say? What are you going to do?
Maintain Consistency with Your Brand Identity
Your retargeting efforts should stay true to your brand identity.
If your brand is known for quality and authenticity, ensure that your retargeting messages reflect those values.
Avoid tactics that could cheapen your brand or feel out of character, such as overly aggressive discount offers or spammy tactics.
Offer Incentives Wisely
While offering discounts can be effective, it’s important to use them wisely.
Don’t offer chocolate to someone who is lactose intolerant. You should know your customers better than that.
Over-relying on discounts can train users to wait for sales rather than purchasing at full price.
Instead, consider offering value-add incentives, such as exclusive content, access to a loyalty program3, or a limited-time bonus.
Create a Sense of Urgency
A sense of urgency can drive users to act.
For a RomCom, that might be a flight leaving or a new job in a new town.
It’s a little different for marketing, but the principle is still the same.
Limited-time offers, countdown timers, or highlighting limited stock can encourage users to complete their purchases before it’s too late.
However, be authentic in your approach; false urgency can irreparably damage trust.
Feeling like you’ve been treated fairly is sometimes more important than being treated well.
“Go Get Her, Son”: Commit To Your Gesture
One of the most effective ways to bring back lost leads is through personalized retargeting. Blindly sending an email isn’t as effective as sending one tailored to attract attention.
These ads can remind users of what they left behind—whether it’s items in their cart or a service they didn’t finish signing up for. (Especially if you capture Email Address early on).
For instance, if a user added a product to their cart but didn’t complete the purchase, show them an ad featuring that exact product (or related ones), possibly with a discount or an incentive like free shipping.
That way, you know it’s aligned to your users needs.
Choose Your Channel
Leverage Email Marketing
Email marketing is a great tool for re-engaging lost leads. It’s an inexpensive, 1:1 way to reach your audience.
Personalized emails can serve as gentle nudges, reminding users of what (who) they left behind.
Segment your email list to target users based on their behavior and demographics. Some common examples could be leads who viewed a specific product multiple times but didn’t buy, or people in a certain geographic area.
A well-timed email offering a discount or providing additional information about the product they were interested in can be the push they need to return.
Utilize Push Notifications Carefully
Push notifications can be highly effective but must avoid being intrusive—or else they’ll get turned off.
Offer valuable content, such as reminders about limited-time offers or restocked items they were interested in.
Make sure to allow users an easy way to opt-out of these notifications to prevent annoyance, or they’ll suppress all of them through system options.
As discussed in a successful case study, companies like Duolingo have leveraged useful notifications that align with user habits, which led to increased engagement without spamming users.
Consider Direct Mail
Read Her Signals: Monitor and Adjust Your Strategies
A/B and Multi-Arm Bandit Testing
To refine your retargeting strategies, utilize A/B testing or, even better, multi-arm bandit testing based on the signals you get.
If you get good results from the start, keep going.
…But know when to back off—All of these options incur cost at the immediate and opportunity levels
These testing methods allow you to experiment with different retargeting messages and formats to see which works best.
Multi-arm bandit testing, in particular, dynamically allocates traffic to the best-performing variants, optimizing your campaigns in real time.
For example, you might test different versions of an email or ad to see which wording, images, or call-to-action buttons lead to higher engagement and conversions.
Tracking & Optimization
Finally, continuously monitor the performance of your retargeting campaigns.
Use well-designed key performance indicators (KPIs)4 to make sure you’re on the right track.
Be ready to pivot strategies based on what the data shows if it’s not working.
Retargeting lost leads is as much about strategy as it is about understanding your audience.
By focusing on high-LTV users, personalizing your outreach, and staying true to your brand identity, you can successfully re-engage users and win her back.
It took a little more than just a boombox in the rain, but the storyline is just about the same
You should really think about what you’re doing before you press go
Please don’t actually take dating advice from a marketing tech blog
I know Sharpe also advises against this, but selling solutions to real people requires meeting in the middle.
Common ones are Click-Through Rate (CTR), Conversion Rate, and Return On Ad Spend (ROAS)